Thursday is for Lovers: Stone Cold Steve Austin and Debra McMichael

Steve Austin and Debra McMichael

Remember when “Stone Cold” Steve Austin was banging Debra McMichael during the WWE’s “Attitude Era” of professional wrestling?

You know who does remember? Debra’s ex-husband, Steve “Mango” McMichael, former 1985 Chicago Bears Super Bowl Champion,Ex-Profession Wrestler, and Meatball.

Steve Mango McMichael

This Thursday is for Lovers reminds me of the time my Dad went to a bar in the Chicago suburbs where Steve McMichael was doing an autograph signing (Meatball) and my Dad’s buddy “Snotty” kept calling the bar and asking them to “Please page Steve Austin” over and over again.

And when the bar would page “Steve Austin” over the intercom, McMichael would look around like an asshole

The End

-Brohan

You guessed it, …Frank Stallone.

Frank Stallone is on the hot seat for calling David Hogg, Parkland High School shooting survivor and activist, a “rich little bitch” and a “pussy” on Saturday 3/31. Frank, an avid gun owner, does not agree with Hogg’s anti-gun positions.

Which admittedly is hilarious coming from Frank Stallone, the guy who plays a hobo singing around a fire-lit trash can in the movie “Rocky.”

But obviously, pretty harsh, especially directed towards a high schooler. Pick on someone your own size, right?

Although sucker punching a high school kid in the face does sound like fun….anyways back on track….

The only reason I really know about Frank Stallone, other than being Sly’s brother and a guy I use to prank call in college when I got his phone number from a radio station employee, is that Norm McDonald use to always blame stuff on him on SNL in the 90’s (Also Hilarious).

However, this is hardly out of the ordinary for Frank. Sly Stallone’s little brother isn’t afraid to speak his mind. Just check his Twitter account @Stallone.  Frank Stallone issued an apology the next day, but no one really cares about that.

We all know Frank does think David Hogg is “a pussy,” and his apology is most likely insincere and just damage control.

But that’s kind of where we are at as a country. Frank Stallones and David Hoggs.

-Brohan

Wimpy Diet

I’ve been on a Wimpy Diet lately.
Not like weak “I can’t lift this” wimpy, but like Wimpy from Popeye, Wimpy.
Like I am only eating burgers.
My food pyramid consist of ground beef at the top, and whatever the fuck else comes on my burger at the bottom.
I’ve been familiar with these burgers in the last week:
Wendy’s – Jr. Bacon Cheeseburger aka JBC (2)
McDonald’s – McDouble (Add Mac Sauce) (2)
Chili’s – Bacon Smokehouse Burger
Lion Head Pub, Chicago – Grilled Cheese Cheese Burger
And to top it off, because I am committed to this diet, I had ALDI TACO NIGHT last night.
-Brohan

Deion Sanders

Deion Sanders was sick. He was absolutely one of the most disgusting athletes of all time. And by “sick” and “disgusting” I mean “HE WAS FUCKING AWESOME!” I would suggest immediately searching “Deion Sanders Highlights” on your computer, but if you’re anything like me you’ll waste the next 3 hours of your life.

 

-Brohan

A Text Conversation with Jimbo

JIMBO

Brohan: hows michigan? aghh! 11:13AM

Jimbo: It’s good

Brohan: are you smokin hookahs? weed? Your dick?

Jimbo: Lots of weed

Brohan: fishy…..

Jimbo: There’s nothing fishin

Jimbo: I meant nothing fishy about that

Brohan: are you high right now?

Jimbo: Yeah I am

Jimbo: Had my first wake and bake then smoked right out the shower

Brohan: who do you think you are? Jim Morrison?

Jimbo: Yeah maybe I am. You should’ve seen me Friday and Saturday. I had more than 20 one hitters both days

Brohan: so youre better than me? agh!

Jimbo: This weekend I am the rest of the year you are

Brohan: ass and titties jimbo agh!

Jimbo: T&A T&A. Agh agh agh agh whooooooooooo 12:20PM

Estaban Loaiza Arrested for Possession of 44lbs of Cocaine!

Estaban

Former White Sox All-Star pitcher, Estaban Loaiza, was arrested for possession of 44lbs of Cocaine at his home in San Diego. Loiaza grew up in neighboring Tijuana, Mexico.

Police obtained a search warrant for Loaiza’s home when they found a sophisticated secret compartment inside of his car when he was pulled over for a minor traffic stop.
Wait, what the fuck? Estaban Loaiza?
I always remembered him as the balding, composed, White Sox pitcher who had a 20+ win season in 2003.
And now he’s moving in on El Chapo’s territory?
Loaiza earned north of $40 Million during his playing career.
Ah, hey buddy?…did ah…you not invest well?
Jesus Christ, did you piss all the $$ away?
Or are you just a thrill seeker who likes to smuggle blow across the Mexican border and then watch The Fast and The Furious when you get home?
And 44lbs? Ah…intent to sell much?
FORTY-FOUR, FUCK ME. Even if you’re having Scarface-esc cocaine parties you’d still have 41lbs left at the end of the night (morning).
We’ll, at least this does add some edginess to you.
Actually, when I really think about it, you’re kind of cooler now.
Oh well.